I read this:
http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2012/01/30/sl-letter-of-the-day-we-found-our-unicornbut-shes-engaged
I realize I am stuck on the moniker, and this isn't the topic of the article, but who wants the pressure of being "The Unicorn?"
On any given day, I usually appreciate and enjoy Dan Savage's advice. I really do. Trust me. But who wants to be "The Unattainable," or "The Elusive," or the object of the "Dude! You didn't really think you'd ever get a piece of that, AND still keep your wife, did you?!" type of locker room banter.
Maybe some girls do, but not me. Well, not at MY age anyhow.
All I have ever wanted was to be satisfied, and (dare I say?) happy. Once in a while, (or ok, often...) some adventure and excitement in my relationship are great and fun. Why is it so disturbingly rare to be in a happy, long-lasting, committed relationship? Why is must it be even more rare to find two people to be loved by? Is there some unimpassioned ruling entity out there that says "threesomes" must be made of hopelessly beautiful people, engaged in short term, fleeting and/or risque encounters? Are there no other "normal" people out there who crave committed intimacy (with...eek! more than one person?) on a long-term, loving basis? Please help me discover that someone else has forged this path and can offer advice that will make my daily living situation less...impossible.
We have told our story...we hear stories...but have we ever actually MET anyone? Not all three of them in the same room at the same time.
Good for all you young, sexy, beautiful, successful twenty- or thirty-somethings, engaged in exciting, fulfilling threesomes. I can hardly wait to read someday about how perfectly and wonderfully things worked out for you. And I sincerely hope they do.
Haven't we (meaning "most people," I suppose) all been at some point, ridiculously fanciful and full of beautiful, utopian fantasies of the "dream relationship" occuring during our lifetime? No one said it would be easy. Only after one has experienced the excruciating emotions of not only love, but loss, hatred, grief, bliss, dissappointment, betrayal, jealousy, and spite (among all others), have we become whole, and therefore finally capable of experiencing that "dream relationship." In whatever form it may take.
Wait. Is it just me?
I am human. I am no more or less special than anyone else. I want to feel cared for and loved. I want to care for and love. I don't need to be labeled. Not "The Third" or "The Prize" or (God forbid) "The Unicorn." I am a human being - trying to be as satisfied as possible during the little time I have left on this earth.
I would appreciate if you would refer to me and treat me as such.
Thank you.
P.S. - I have truly and sincerely, down to my CORE, fully enjoyed and appreciated all the special treatment and attention I have received over the past two years. However, it wouldn't be fair to any of us if EACH ONE of us didn't feel that wonderful at any given moment.
